my sisters

This is me and three of my favorite people in the world.

Candice, Holly, me, and Wendy

This is on our vacation this summer to Branson. We found these pictures at Aeropostale and bought them to surprise my Dad. This is one of the only times you will ever see me wear pink. But... I did it for my sisters.

Candice is 23 and married to Michael Dohman. She is the outgoing, fun, loud one of the bunch. She always wants to know what's going on in her little sisters' lives. She is steadfast in what she believes and refuses to back down, but will break it to us gently and lovingly when she knows we're wrong.

Holly is 20 and married to Will Kellenberger. I can always count on Holly to laugh with; we feed off of eachother's stupid comments. She is also the protector of the four of us. She'll defend us to the death and always stick up for her family.

Wendy is 15. She's somebody I could just hang out with and talk to all night or not say anything at all. She instantly makes people feel at ease and want to have a good time. Her carefree, fun-loving spirit attracts others to her.

I'm never bored when I'm with my sisters. I always come away having laughed or cried and sometimes both, and feeling good. Each one of them means so much to me and I don't know where I'd be without their support, their love, and all the memories we've made together. They, including my parents and brothers-in-law, are the people I probably pray for the hardest and most often for. And I know they do the same for me.

Family is the group of people who know your past, all your mistakes and short-comings. They know your imperfections and your weaknesses. Yet, they still love you regardless. They love each weed in your garden. These are my sisters.

titled

After some long talks this weekend with my parents, roommates, and cousin... I've come to a conclusion. Everybody places their faith in something. I've decided to place it in Jesus Christ. My family, friends, and fellow church members have all found something in this faith that they haven't found anywhere else. And it's true, when I have been trusting in God and relying on Him, I have had peace beyond description.

It may always be something I struggle with... but I'm going to keep living each day with this faith. Jesus Christ really did save my soul and there is a God out there who loves me and who created all that is around me. When I begin to believe that, everything falls back into place. I once again am able to believe all that is said in the Bible and everything I've been taught. It's not fake anymore or make-believe.

It's terrifying to think everything I've ever been taught has been a lie. So I'm going to push that thought from my mind and live as though it's Truth. All I can do is trust. And have faith. I've been praying for God to reveal Himself to me. And He is. Each day, I'm renewed. He shouldn't have to do that for me to believe. I'm sorry my faith can be conditional at times.

I don't like the feeling of not knowing. It terrifies me beyond words... to think that there isn't a God who loves me and that there is no plan or purpose for my life. Why would I choose to live my life that way?

Point of Grace's "I Choose You" says:
If everybody's worshipping something
I choose You.

Lord, forgive my doubting and strengthen my faith. I come to You with a broken spirit, hoping to be renewed. Reveal Yourself to me and help me remember what I'm living my life for. Give me the strength to know and understand You in the moments when I have no idea what's going on and I can't find a reason that I'm here. If we're going to do this together, please help me out down here and let me know You're really there. I love You and I need You. In Your name,
Amen.

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Today was a test of faith. I left school today after another encounter with my Buddhist classmate and called my mom immediately. She wasn't home, so I left a message on my house phone. It went something like this:

Me: Mom or Dad, can one of you do me a favor? Can you just call me up and tell me that my faith is real? That everything I've ever been taught is truth? Can you remind me that Jesus Christ is the only way to heaven and that He is my Savior? Can you tell me there is a heaven where I'll spend eternity? Can you tell me that it's not all a joke? We're living our lives how we are for a reason. Just call me and encourage me and tell me the truth. I'm not renouncing my Christianity or anything, just call me. Thanks. Love you. Bye.

And ya know what? I know all this stuff. I know what I know. I just have these freaky times where I am like, Woah! Is this all for real? But then all it usually takes is a look outside my car window at the trees or thinking of a new-born baby, and my faith is renewed. Or a call from Mom telling me exactly what I need to hear.

It's funny because one day I want to go out and tell the whole world about Jesus and how He saved me from eternal destruction, and the next day... I am wondering if the Bible is even for real or if it's just a bunch of stories we've all been tricked into believing.

Do you guys ever struggle like this with your faith? I just want to know I'm not alone and that everybody wonders about God. It's something I've always had a problem with. I'm too much of a deep thinker and freak myself out too often. I thought about this kind of stuff when I was young. I tell you what, if I wasn't a Christian, who knows what this psycho mind would be thinking and believing. OK, well, thanks guys for reading. Hope it made sense. Let me know your thoughts on this.

yay for AAA (take 2)

So today when I was coming home from school, I was thinking about the talk I just had with a guy in my Lit class about Buddhism. Definitely was not thinking about the whole keys in the car thing. Locked keys in Melvin again. Whipped out the ol' cell and since my AAA card was in Mel, I didn't have the number. But then I remembered it would be in my recent call list, which it was. (nat rolls eyes at herself)

This time I had an even more pleasant talk with a lady on the phone. We laughed and joked and are pretty much life-long friends. Then a nice young man named Andy came and opened Melvin. Then I ate at Carlos O'Kelly's with Bethany. Our waiter's name was Andy, and he was really good. I like Andys today.

So... Bill's Lock and Key Service serviced me twice within three days. Very friendly people and I'd highly recommend them. And they're guaranteed to be there within 60 minutes... which they were.

yay for AAA

Writing a post instead of working on my paper... bad idea... but I'm doing it anywayz...

This morning I got back from my orthodontist appointment after finding a much better way to get there without having to drive ALL AROUND Bloomington. I jumped out of of Melvin and quickly locked him up. Two steps from Mel, I turned around and grimaced. I had locked my keys inside... again.

Well, I knew the drill. I whipped out the cell and called Triple A.

AAA Lady: What is your emergency?
Me: I locked my keys in my car.
AAA Lady: Ok, m'aam, is your car running?
Me: No... (chuckle) Is my car running? No.
AAA Lady: Oh, you'd be surprised at the calls we get.
We then proceeded to share a hearty laugh.

But our joy was soon ended when she said my mom had to be present to unlock Mel (she didn't say Mel) because my card was in her name. I called Mom. She called AAA and explained.

Melvin is open after a jolly man with big glasses came and unlocked him.

The end.